A Conversation with Dr Ryan 和莱恩博士的对话。

As a finale to the 7-lesson VIA Intensive training, VIA Institute generously offers an optional one-on-one bonus coaching session for every participant to review our VIA-Pro report (i.e. our character strength report).  The purpose of meeting was “To review your VIA-Pro report. This can be a general review session or it can be done in the context of a personal or professional growth issue, a goal, or a life difficulty.”

I signed myself up immediately for this precious opportunity.  And, am I glad I did.  I was fortunate to have Dr Ryan, our 7-week course instructor as my session coach.  I could not wait to meet him.

Dr Ryan was great!  That short 45-minute session was not only a fruitful one for my own self, it was really a good session to see how an experienced psychologist uses the VIA Report to coach his client.  I learned a lot about myself, I learned so much on applying it to people I wish to help.  At one point in time, under the patient guidance of Dr Ryan, I even achieved a breakthrough on how I have always seen myself.

My 3 most important discoveries from this 45-minute session with Dr Ryan :

  • Embrace all your signature strengths (your top 5 character strengths). This is because they represent the “real you”.  Accepting and embracing them allow you to be happier because this is when you are more true to yourself.  In other words, apply Gratitude to your character strengths, appreciate each of them, use them, mobilise and expand the use.
  • Prudence and Bravery can go hand-in-hand when used appropriately!  I was always so stubbornly believed that the two were in conflict and wish I could have more of one and less of the other. Dr Ryan made me see for myself there were incidences in my life that I used them together both at the same time; there was even a major one that enabled me to make a turning point in my life and got me to where I am today.  I can’t wait to tell Sarah (my team member) about this realisation.
  • When we apply character strengths to career coaching, it would not be  appropriate (close to dangerous) to conclude that certain character strengths match/fit certain career options.  A character strength can be used and applied within different career options.  The key to our role really is to help people to know their strengths and use them in as many situations as possible.  Dr Ryan gave a good example, a person high in Humor does not necessarily have to be a comedian.  He can be a doctor (no less!) and he can apply Humor when it is much needed to defuse stressful situations and this strength can be very helpful (and needed) in high-stress environment like a hospital.

THANK YOU DR RYAN, from the bottom of my heart.

VIA课程的压轴,是VIA研究所慷慨提供给每一位参与者的一对一性格优点的个别辅导。个别辅导的目的是“帮您分析您的VIA性格优点分析报告。这可以是一个一般性的讨论分析,也可以是个人或专业上发展的问题,或生活上所遇到的困难。”

我立即把握这个宝贵的机会去报名。我很幸运,我的辅导教练是我们VIA七周课程的导师,莱恩博士。我万分期待。

莱恩博士真的很棒! 那短短四十五分钟的辅导不仅帮助丰富了我自己,它也真正是一个很好的学习机会。我亲身经历一个富有经验的心理学专家如何利用VIA性格优点分析报告帮助他的当事人。我学到了很多关于我自己。从莱恩博士身上,我也学到了如何更有效率地去帮助他人。

在某一个时间点,在莱恩博士耐心指导下,我甚至对自己一向来的看法取得了突破性进展。

我在这四十五分钟里最重要的三个领悟:

  • 完全地去接纳自己所有的关键性格优点(您最强的五个性格优点)。这是因为它们代表了“真实的你”。接纳它们让您去面对和拥有真正的自我,只有这样,您才会感到更幸福快乐。换句话说,用感恩的心态去面对您的性格优点,好好地运用和扩大使用它们。
  • 如果运用方法得当,“审慎”和“勇气”两大优点竟是可以齐头并进的!以往,我总是固执地相信这两个优点是互相冲突的。莱恩博士让我看到我曾经多次成功地在同一时间运用“审慎”和“勇气”。还有那么的一次,让自己踏出生命中重要的一大步。
  • 当我们运用性格优点帮助他人作职业选择时,执着地去把某些性格优点匹配於某些职业选择上是不恰当,甚至是危险的。一个性格优点可加以运用和发挥在不同的职业上。我们重要的任务是去帮助人们了解自己的优点,和帮助他们在尽可能在多方面情况下运用他们的优点。莱恩博士给了一个很好的例子,一个拥有幽默感,善于逗人开心的人,并不一定要当一个喜剧演员。他绝对可以是一名医生,在高压环境中,如医院,运用其幽默感,帮助他人看较轻松的一面而化解紧张的情况。

谢谢您博士瑞安,衷心地。

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